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What does it mean to take a strengths-based approach to understanding adverse childhood experiences?
Trainer, speaker and consultant, Mary-anne Hodd, combines her own lived experience of the care system and psychological perspectives to support a strengths-based understanding of care experience. On Thursday 6 February, Mary-anne will lead an online Live Classroom on the connection between early life experiences and later life outcomes. Here’s an insight from Mary-anne into what you can expect from the session.
In part one of this series, I shared my perspective on shifting the language and statistics surrounding children and young people in care, moving away from a deficit-based view to one that highlights their strengths. I reflected on the feelings and practices that shaped my own care journey and understanding of what it means to be a child in care. In this final part, I’ll delve into my personal experience with ACEs (Adverse Childhood Experiences) and how reframing the impact of early adversity has helped me gain a deeper understanding of myself and my ongoing path toward healing.
When I first discovered the “ACEs” quiz, I felt an overwhelming need to take it. I wanted to know just how ‘doomed’ I was based on the score I would get. From what I understood, if you had a score of four or more, you were linked to a range of poor health outcomes – everything from a higher likelihood of getting cancer or using drugs, to the one that hit me hardest: dying, on average, 20 years earlier than your peers. I knew my score would be above four, but I had to find out ‘how bad it really was’.
So, I quickly googled the quiz and answered the 10 questions, explored across three categories: neglect, abuse, and household dysfunction. As I worked through the questions, I couldn’t help but think about all the memories from my childhood that haunted me but didn’t fit neatly into the questions being asked. And why were the questions about parents only focused on my mum? Nothing about my dad – weird, I thought.
Anyway, I finished the quiz and stared at my result: a score of seven. And that was me being generous – it could have easily been an eight, but I remember thinking if I ticked ‘yes’ to that one, it would just feel like too much. So, seven it was.
The number stared back at me, and before I knew it, I was rushing downstairs to my now-husband, shouting, “I’m doomed! I’m going to die 20 years before you!” He looked at me, gave a wry smile, and said, “That can’t be the end of it. Go back, do more reading, and then come back when you know more.”
So that’s exactly what I did. And that was just the beginning.
That marked the beginning of my understanding of “what made the difference.” It was the start of answering the question: “Why might I be okay when everything around me suggests I shouldn’t be?” This self-reflection and the research that followed helped me see the potential for positive change, healing, and growth after adversity. It allowed me to approach the ACEs research with compassion for myself, recognising that my behaviours and experiences were shaped by what I’ve been through – and that’s okay.
This understanding also gave me insight into the impact of the support I received while growing up in care. It opened my eyes to what we can do to help other children and young people in similar situations. These themes and lessons are what I’ll be sharing, through my lived experience, in my upcoming Live Classroom. Together, we will explore ACEs research and consider, “Now that we know about it, what can we do about it?”
The session will be framed with hope, focusing on relational practice and stories of connection. I hope to see you there!
Thank you, Mary-anne, for this personal account.
Mary-anne’s Live Classroom on Thursday 6 February is now fully booked. You can see the other Live Classrooms we have coming up here>>
